Think high school yearbook superlatives — if Anna Paquin and Malia Obama were classmates.
Most likely to book an actual trip in a spaceship (because she can afford it): Sandra Bullock
Bullock is the biggest breadwinner in the past 12 months, according to Forbes in a ranking of fellow actresses. Thanks mostly to her role as a medical engineer lost in space in Gravity, Bullock landed an estimated $51 million, followed by 23-year-old Jennifer Lawrence, who took home $34 million. Jennifer Aniston came in at No. 3 with $31 million. And you thought that 5% raise was something to feel good about.
Second-best news out of Ibiza: Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton reunite
The Justin Bieber and Orlando Bloom feud is still No. 1, but this has to be second-best. Former BFFs Kardashian and Hilton have kissed and made up! They, along with a host of other famous people such as Kanye West, the Biebs, Diddy, Kate Moss and Naomi Campbell, converged at Givenchy designer Riccardo Tisci's 40th birthday party. The former reality-show superstar and the current reality-show superstar sat down together and reminisced about a 2006 trip to Ibiza. "It was so good to see you & catch up!! Loves it lol," Kardashian wrote on Instagram, simultaneously referencing one of Hilton's long-past catchphrases and reminding us why we're glad it's no longer the early 2000s.
Most likely to school Larry King: Anna Paquin
We all know King can ruffle feathers — he's a master at making guests squirm. But not Paquin. As King pressed her about her relationship and her bisexuality on his Web series, Larry King Now, she patiently explained that she's "happily, monogamously married" to her True Blood co-star Stephen Moyer. "But you were bisexual?" he asked. "I don't think (bisexuality is) a past-tense thing," she said. "Are you still straight if you are with somebody? … If you were to break up with them or if they were to die, it doesn't prevent your sexuality from existing. It doesn't really work like that."
Best (failed) effort to blend in with commoners: Malia Obama
For Secret Service agents, standing watch during a news conference or staying alert during every single speech on a campaign tour has to be kind of boring. But a few of them got to enjoy a little culture at the Chicago music festival Lollapalooza, where 16-year-old Malia Obama spent last weekend (minus Mom and Dad). Although she wore an unassuming, cheerful yellow outfit, she didn't quite blend in (bodyguards tend to tip people off). Oh, well — at least the agents got to check out Outkast, Eminem and Kings of Leon, and for free!
Show most likely to be hated by Kat Von D: Skin Wars
Apologies to Von D, the queen of Ink TV shows: Tattoos are so over. On to the next trend: body painting, which also happens to be a really sneaky way of getting naked people on TV without having to blur out the important bits. Rebecca Romijn, who not only was the first Sports Illustrated model to be body-painted but also went full-body blue as Mystique in X-Men, stars as the host and a judge on the new GSN reality competition Skin Wars. Same reality TV competition vibe, more naked people.
Best use of beading: Cheryl Hines
The actress married into one famous family at the Kennedy compound in Hyannis Port, Mass., last weekend. Hines, who has starred as Larry David's fictional wife in HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm, earning herself two Emmy nominations, said "I do" to Robert Kennedy Jr., son of Robert F. Kennedy and nephew of JFK. But never mind all that — it was her strapless Romona Keveža Collection dress with pearl beading that really caught our eye. "Hines continues the Kennedy legacy of iconic women with timeless style," a news release from the fashion house said. Agreed.